If you’ve ever been tempted to do a Tony Robbin’s training, please don’t hesitate. Do it now! Why do I say that?
Doing ‘Unleash the Power Within’ 15 years ago has completely changed my life. It has been the catalyst for my personal growth, moving from anxiety and depression to confidence and success.
Has there ever been a time in your life when you look back at your younger self and you don’t recognise yourself?
Well, I cannot believe how much my life has changed since I attended that particular event at the Excel Center 15 years ago.
Back then I was in a marriage that didn’t work and wasn’t good for me, (I was married to a psychopath). I was doing a job I didn’t enjoy that was causing me stress and anxiety and many sleepless nights. I didn’t have time for my family and friends because I was so consumed by my work. And I carved out no time for myself. I looked old for my age, with all the stress and worry, and I was fed up and disgruntled with the world. I couldn’t see a way out!
Somehow, I had lost my sense of self and felt like the ball in a pinball machine – being hurled from one place to the next by other peoples’ demands.
I have to say the environment was alien to me, seeing thousands of people all in one room and most of them jumping up and down on their chairs, dancing and hollering. I wasn’t really sure whether I would last the morning, these people didn’t really seem to be my tribe. But with my friends’ help, I did stay and I am so pleased I did.
Spending 3 days with Tony Robbins challenged my thinking and caused me to look at different aspects of my life in new ways.
For the first time, I took responsibility for what was going on in my life and decided to change it. It took courage and wasn’t easy but it started that weekend.
Fire Walking was a highlight – walking on fire and not burning my feet was terrifying. But I followed Tony’s instructions about getting into an empowering state and it worked. That taught me that I can do anything now if I put my mind to it. Boy has that mind-shift changed my personal growth and success!
I began to realise just how powerful our minds are and that they can be either used for good or ill. Our thoughts can empower us or annihilate us – the choice is yours.
I split up with my husband after 18 years of marriage and have now reached a balanced way of co-existing and co-parenting my son. I am the Founder of the Thrive Tribe and help busy women to feel more empowered and share strategies so they can have more success in their careers, relationships, health and wellbeing.
Unbelievably my current partner happened to be at the same UPWevent! Can you believe that? We didn’t meet but somehow it is reassuring and rather wonderful to know he was in the same room all those years ago, experiencing his version of the UPW journey.
I an now an award-winning Speaker, Author and Trainer. To my joy, I have a thriving business that educates and trains people about mental wellbeing and how to set your self up to Thrive at work and in life. If you don’t have a sustainable strategy you are more likely to burnout and derail your career.
What I have discovered on my journey is that there are 5 key things you need to master if you want to Thrive at work and in life – but more of these personal growth strategies another time.
If you have ever felt tempted to do a Tony Robbins event – hesitate no longer and take charge of your life by attending UPW (Unleash the Power Within). Tickets are going fast and you may have to pay more than you had hoped but what price would you put on your success and freedom?
I’ll be heading for the US in December to do his ‘Date with Destiny’ event next. I wonder what will happen as a consequence – can’t wait to find out – I am on my way!
Are you a busy woman rushing around trying to balance family life with work but then never having any time for yourself? Or maybe you’re an entrepreneur feeling like you’re spread too thinly and there are not enough hours in the day to get everything done? Maybe you’re fed up with having to sacrifice yourself, your health, enjoyment and relationships to fulfil others demands.
Over the last 10 years, I have moved from being hospitalised from burning myself out to finding a balance in my life.
I want to share with you 3 simple ways to get more done in your day so you can achieve more, worry less and get yourself back on track.
Tip 1 – Sleep Rules
The mistake that many people make with their productivity is that they prioritise work over everything else. This includes sacrificing sleep to get things done.
Sleep is the most underrated productivity tool there is. Research has shown if you don’t get enough sleep, things take longer to do, you make more mistakes, your brain can’t focus or be as creative as it might and you can feel cranky too!
You know what its like when you see people wandering around sleep deprived and they have no idea how it’s affecting their productivity, but yet this is seen as normal.
So, instead of prioritising work and compromising your sleep you need to simply flip it on its head and prioritise sleep. You’ll feel refreshed, energised, think more clearly, be more productive and have time for the things that matter.
Tip 2 – Be in Charge
Another mistake that people make is allowing their day to be in charge of them rather than them being in charge of their day.
This means that they are influenced by what comes into their in-tray or email and they often then get caught up in what appears to be urgent rather than what is important.
When that happens day in day out the important things don’t ever happen in your life which causes your business, career or other priorities not to move forward as they should
So instead of allowing your day to be in charge of you, you need to spend some time strategising each day. To strategise, simply make sure you spend a few minutes before your day starts to decide:-
what’s important now
what must get done today
how can you be your best self
This will give you more focus and you will feel more in control. Get the important things done not just the urgent things.
Tip 3 – No Time for Distractions
Another mistake many people make with their productivity is they allow themselves to be continuously interrupted. This makes it more difficult to focus, think clearly and to get any quality work done.
Instead of allowing yourself to be interrupted you want to create blocks of uninterrupted time. Schedule time to do a particular task, create a space away from distraction, turn off your phone and computer ideally or if that’s not possible, at least turn off the notifications and tell people you don’t want to be interrupted for the next period of time.
With fewer distractions, you will have more time to focus on the things and people that really matter.
NOW if you have found value in these three tips you going to love the Thrive Tribe Live Quarterly meetups.
The Thrive Tribe Live events are for like-minded busy women who want to get more control back in their lives so they can have more success without the stress and more joy and confidence.
Join me at the next gathering in Central London here, where I will be sharing more tips on how to bring more balance in your life and not burn out.
Most people admit to being very busy, often over-busy these days, but very few people, when they think about it, will say they are very productive.
But why is that?
People don’t mean to waste time but that’s what happens more often than not.
Oh, I can hear the shouts – “No – I’m not a time-waster”.
Well I’m sure you don’t mean to be, but could that be the end result of your actions?
OK, let’s take a look.
What are the signs of someone who is busy but not productive?
Lots of loose ends/tasks left incomplete
Rushing from one thing to next with no time to think
Everything seems urgent
Little or no downtime
Working hard and pushing through to get things done
So, if you want stop wasting time and be more productive, you need to do these things.
1. Have a good night’s sleep.
Sleep is the most underrated health habit and productivity tool there is. A good night’s sleep means 7 to 9 hours according to the National Sleep Foundation. Research shows that if you deprive yourself of sleep you make more mistakes and things take longer – but you know that anyway.
2. Create time to think.
”The quality of everything we do is dependent on the thinking we do first” (Nancy Kline). But so few people create time to think and they find themselves running from task to task, often responding to what’s urgent rather than important. If you want to be productive, carve out and protect your thinking time and don’t just slot it in after your working day.
3. Create an environment that allows and encourages focused concentration.
Organisations really let themselves down here.
Most people have an open plan office and are expected to be at the beck and call of their superiors. This is not an environment for hyper-productivity. People need autonomy and uninterrupted time if they’re going to be productive and do quality work. People should be allowed to work in areas free from distractions at least some of the time. People these days are so used to being distracted that the art of concentration is being lost. Few people can focus and concentrate for long before they seek a distraction/dopamine hit. Focused concentration is like a muscle that needs to be built. Use it or lose it. I believe that being able to concentrate to get quality work done will distinguish the people who will be successful.
Creating uninterrupted periods of time requires planning and scheduling. Most often, people give up these blocks of time easily. They need to be ruthlessly protected if you want to be productive.
4. Choose your tasks wisely.
It’s not possible to have focused concentration all day long. There are times when our brains need to just tick over. This is completely normal. This means that people who want to be productive need to notice their high and low levels of focus and attention and choose their tasks wisely. High focus and attention periods should be used for thinking, problem-solving and creative work. Low levels of focus and attention can be used for admin tasks and data sorting.
5. Take a break.
Our brains do their best to process information but have a finite capacity which is different for everybody. The pre-frontal cortex can hold only a limited amount of information before it gets full and needs a break to let go of what it doesn’t need, store what it does and be ready for action again. If you find yourself just not able to process/get stuff done, take a break. It doesn’t need to be long. Even standing up and taking a breath can be enough. But it is folly to keep going.
6. Make meetings matter.
Most people book meetings without considering whether that is the best way to get stuff done. Few people stop and think about what they really want from a meeting, e.g. who should be there, who should not be there, what is expected of the participants, before, during and after the meeting.
Without great clarity, meetings can often be a waste of time while still allowing people to look very busy. Take a moment and ask yourself: Is this meeting really necessary? Do I need to be there?
If you’re really finding it difficult to focus and you’re time-wasting and procrastinating it could be that you’re in the wrong job, i.e. what is important to you is not aligned with your organisation or the job you signed up to do. If so, it’s time for a re-think.
So, if you want to determine your future success the choice is yours. Do you want to be part of the focused few or the distracted many?
Are you having problems dealing with a difficult boss? Do you want to get past the hurdle of a challenging colleague so you can come and leave the office without a strained relationship looming over your head?
It may be time to have that tough conversation with them so you can speak up and talk about the issues that are weighing you down. Unfortunately, difficult conversations take strategy, skill, courage, and confidence that you may not have. Not yet, anyway.
It is important to remember that your ability to speak up has an influence on your success in the office, at home, and with life in general. If you can’t get past the stressful experiences you’re having, your productivity is limited, relationships are strained, and opportunities are constrained. You don’t want that, especially because it will slowly chip away at your self-confidence and undermine your sense of security.
Unfortunately, if your heart race or you get that sinking feeling every time you think about talking to your boss or confronting a colleague, it will be difficult to put on a brave face. It would feel even worse if you crumble in front of certain people or when you beat yourself up before and after every attempt of having a tough conversation.
Here’s the thing though, if you don’t make an effort to have a courageous conversation, you will continue to struggle. The first thing you need to do is overcome your fears and hesitation.
How do you do this exactly?
6 Keys to Have the Confidence to Have a Courageous Conversation
They’re human too
Regardless of how difficult your boss might be, they are human too and they’re likely to be throwing their weight around because they are under a lot of stress or pressure. Their problems might even come from a variety of sources and they’re having difficulty coping, which accounts for their challenging behaviour. The same thing could be true with a difficult colleague. If what you’re doing, or the lack thereof, is exacerbating the situation, then you should think of ways to help alleviate it.
People are more likely to say yes to those they like and reciprocate accordingly. So make sure to build rapport and behave in a likeable manner. This can influence how people will respond to you. If you’re not doing this yet, you might want to switch to this tactic. Just don’t end up looking like you’re sucking up. This can have the opposite effect.
Be your best self
It is possible that your confidence is lacking because you’re unsure of how confident and resourceful you are. If you’re mismanaging your state of mind and wellbeing, then you’re not setting yourself up to be the best version of you. So make sure you’re well-fed, watered, and well-rested.
Create a positive zone
Think of a positive outcome and play it through your mind over and over again. Make sure to watch the entire scene unfold and savour every moment that you celebrate your success in those thoughts. Then, whenever you start thinking negative or playing out the worst case scenarios in your head, stop, and go to your positive zone. You know the adage. “Be careful what you wish for”
Do something in their favour
What can you do to a challenging colleague as a favour? It doesn’t have to be grand, but something they will appreciate. Research showed that people are likely to reciprocate and do you a favour if you’ve done the same to them.
If it’s not possible to make the first move, make them feel like they’ve done you a favour. Even as simple as borrowing a book and showing your gratitude would make them feel open to you and receptive of your friendship or attention.
Work on your own demons and fears
Is there a reason that you have difficulty having a courageous conversation? Did a horrible parent or teacher shut you down and stomped on your self-esteem? It may be time to unhook on that history and free yourself. It may just be what you need to find your confidence and courage again.
It is important to understand that a relationship is a system that you can control. If you change something with the system, you will get a different response or an outcome. So if you want to build a working relationship with your boss or colleague, change something. If you didn’t succeed in your first attempt at having a tough conversation, try again. Make sure to try all the strategies listed above and enjoy the fruits of your effort.